I started dating my husband in early 2020 after I had gotten out of a domestic violence relationship. I had three children from previous relationships and John quickly changed his life from a single man to a family man. We found out we were pregnant with twins a few months of being together but I ended up suffering from a missed miscarriage at 8 weeks. After that, we had to turn to IVF due to my tubes being tied and the chances of getting pregnant on our own were slim to none. We went through multiple rounds of IVF until finally we got our positive pregnancy test. This is where the journey with Mia begins. She was healthy the entire pregnancy even though for me, it was a very difficult 9 months. I was throwing up the entire pregnancy. I got gotten Covid when I was 29 weeks pregnant and after about 2-3 weeks, I had finally recovered. I had terrible acid reflux that caused me to throw up every night. On Wednesday, March 16, 2022, we had a perfect OB visit. Her heart rate was beautiful and the blood flow and placenta on the ultrasound looked wonderful. I was only dilated 1 cm. There were no signs of anything being wrong. I was diagnosed with gestational hypertension/mild preeclampsia at around 34 weeks so I was being monitored closely. I had weekly ultrasounds and was at the hospital twice a week for non-stress tests and IV fluids. All my levels had been good that day. I went home from my appointment and completed her nursery and put her car seat in our SUV because induction was only a week away. She was breech so I tried to do some things to get her to flip because I didn’t want to have a C-section. Everything was going good and I felt super excited to meet our daughter the following week. But something had happened between that day and that night. I was having contractions, but I had had them for awhile due to having a higher level of amniotic fluid. Thursday morning, the contractions weren’t subsiding and my belly would remain pretty hard even after the contraction would stop. I also felt decreased fetal movement so I decided to go to the hospital to get checked out. I remember I had sent my husband a message saying “I’m going to feel silly if it’s nothing, but I’d rather make sure she’s okay.“ Little did we know that our lives were about to take a drastic turn for the worst and we were about to be faced with unbearable heartbreak. When I got checked into the hospital, they tried to find her heartbeat on the monitors. There were two different heart rates, however hers wasn’t much higher than mine. That’s when we found out that her heart rate was really low and was dropping drastically with every passing minute. My OB rushed in with the bedside ultrasound machine and I’ll never forget the image of her heart barely beating on the monitor. Emergency C-section was ordered. I was there alone because John was at work. I had to call him and I only had time to tell him that we were having an emergency C-section and that he needed to get there quick. I wasn’t able to tell him anything that was going on. I was rushed into the OR. It was so traumatic and I was so scared with all the chaos going on around me. Several nurses working on getting things prepped, trying to get an IV started on me, getting the urine catheter placed. Giving me oxygen and placing the drape to block off the lower half of my body. The anesthesiologist giving me the medicine through my IV. I remember screaming that I wasn’t falling asleep and that they needed to put me to sleep and get my baby out. The EXCRUCIATING pain I felt as he injected the medication in my ivf and it flowed through my hand up my arm and to my neck. And then I was out. My OB worked so incredibly fast to get to her—I believe it was 12 minutes from the time they got me to the OR to the time she was out even though it felt like a lifetime that I was laying there, helpless. Unfortunately, it was too late and they couldn’t get her back. She went straight into her daddy’s arms where he loved on her for quite some time while I was in recovery and being transferred to our room. It was determined that I had placenta abruption meaning my placenta detached from the uterine wall. It wasn’t a large abruption, however it happened in a very crucial location—directly under her umbilical cord and cut off direct contact to her oxygen and blood flow. We were able to spend 2 and half days with our precious baby girl. We will never understand why our little girl wasn’t given a chance. This pain is not like anything we have ever felt before and our hearts are just completely broken. I’m thankful for our family and friends and so thankful for my husband. We have an incredible support system thankfully ❤️
With that, John and I are proud to announce our perfect little angel Mia Marie. She was born on March 17, 2022 and was 5lbs 3oz and 18.5 inches long. She had her daddy’s nose and eye shape, his feet and hands(long and skinny feet and long toes and fingers). She also had his broad chest. She had my ears, lips, chin, and hair color. I looked at her and saw the most perfect mix of John and I. She is absolutely beautiful and perfect and we couldn’t be more proud to be her mommy and daddy.
We love you so so much Mia and miss you terribly.
Like I had said above, we got to spend 2.5 very precious days with our sweet girl before I was discharged and the funeral home came and picked her up. This was all made possible because of a very special machine called a Cuddle Cot. The Cuddle Cot is a cooling pad that is placed in a bassinet and is connected to a specially insulated hose and keeps the infants body cool. It allows her body temperature to stay low and helps to slow down the process that a body goes through once you have passed. I am starting Mia’s Mission to not only keep my daughters memory alive and to break the silence of pregnancy and infant loss, but also because I want to raise money so that I can donate Cuddle Cots to surrounding area hospitals that do not have access to these. I want to give grieving parents the ability to spend more time with their babies and make as many memories as they possibly can with them before they must say See You Later. My daughter was sent to Heaven entirely too soon, but I am so very grateful for the Cuddle Cot for allowing us the opportunity to spend those days with her as she looked as though she was peacefully sleeping but was wrapped in the arms of her grandmother in heaven. I’m at least thankful and feel a little but of peace knowing that she was greeted in heaven by her grandma Janet and that she was the first person she saw when she got there.
I will remember her, tell her story, and say her name—always.
- r .
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